The Daily Fuss

Movie Real

I am acutely aware of that point in every movie where things are perfectly peachy, it's sunny, dad is playing with the kids, the birthday party is in full swing ... It's the high point in the movie just before it all goes to hell.

It's disconcerting.

I point out this movie moment every single time we watch one (which isn't very often). It's escalated to the point that Ryan tries to beat be to the moment of recognition - usually about 34-37 minutes in.

It's a little game and we laugh about it. But, I must say, in all honesty, I HATE the shattering of homeostasis and the anxiety of the resulting struggle (or rest of the movie) wherein characters practically kill themselves to get back to the place they were 63-67 minutes earlier. I'd be fine with ending the flick back at minute 34.

I love my life. I could use more sleep, a few more bucks and a round of lipo of course, but I am happy. Really, truly, unabashedly happy. And, in light of said happiness, I no longer have space in my head or the emotional constitution for sadness or drama on screen. In other words, I don't need a movie to get myself all worked up. I can handle that just fine on my own. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

I mentioned that in the small moments, fear creeps in and plants the "what if" seeds. What if this very moment is as good as it gets? What if something horrendous happens and my happy is ripped from my grasp like one of Lue's chew toys from Lei's little hands? What if ...?

I just can't imagine losing my family, as it exists, at this second. I can hardly bear to think about Leighton getting bigger. I even get blurry-eyed when I consider having another baby. Our crew wouldn't be the same - the Freeman clan would no longer exists as it does on this day. What if that baby is sick? Every second that passes - every tick of the clock - is a moment for me to either panic like it's minute 38 or settle in and savor everything for which I am grateful.

Obviously, the latter is the more attractive option. I'm just saying ... sometimes it takes effort to forget about the laundry or work or the fact that Lue hasn't had a fresh hairdo in two months. The effort always pays off. Life is a work in progress and every day I choose to live mine one movie minute at a time.

Am I on a limb out here or are you feeling me? How do you handle it? Leave a comment and share your fuss with us.

WIN IT! and WTF? Follow Up: Tummy Tub

We've created so much fuss over the Tummy Tub we decided to give one away and let you (and your wee ones) decide for yourselves whether this baby bather is all that it's cracked up to be. Read through this What the Fuss? follow up, leave a comment and be entered for a chance to win your very own Tummy Tub.

WHAT THE FUSS? FOLLOW UP

We tried the Tummy Tub and stand back in July, when Leighton was only eight weeks old. It wasn't the best experience and I said as much in What the Fuss? Tummy Tub. I was contacted by the Tummy Tub distributor for the US, Janis McKellar, who found my review to be entirely too harsh and thought that I should have reached out to her for more info. Not in the mood to argue the validity of my thoughtful opinion, I agreed to give the Tummy Tub another shot.

Leighton and I purchased a brand new, original Tummy Tub on Amazon for $42.70 plus shipping. I avoided the stand this time because it was too tippy for my little jumping bean. Plus, it cost another $50 and $100 for a tub situation is a bit much. So, I skipped it. If you want to buy it or a curious in any way, here it is.

Janis did have a compelling response to my remarks on the price:

• Tummy Tubs are produced in Europe & Israel, as opposed to China. Everything is CPSIA compliant and has passed the highest safety standards.
• Tummy Tub plastic is the highest quality available.
• Standard infant tubs are often made of inferior quality plastic resulting in the purchase of more than one. Plus, standard tubs are only comfortable for a short period of time resulting in the purchase of a larger tub and/or toddler seat. The Tummy Tub can work for tots up to nearly two years of age.

Well-played Tummy Tub lady. I am never one to turn my nose up at products made from quality materials in fully developed countries. For the actual tub piece, $42.70 is not a bad price for a bathing device that goes from newborn to toddler.

Now, as far as utility, I will say that after using the Tummy Tub all week, I was often wet and it was hard to rinse Lei's head because I like to tip her back in the tub to avoid getting water in her eyes. As far as pooping in the tub, well ... she did that in the big tub this morning and admittedly, it would have been a hell of a lot easier to clean up if she had been in the Tummy Tub.

With regard to Leighton's Tummy Tub reviews they were mixed. When I first put her in it, she was interested and happy. But, I filled it up too high initially and had to "pause" her bath to remove some of the water. When I put her back in, she was mad at me, wouldn't sit down and abused me with a washcloth.

That's basically the story all week. If Lei was in a good mood, Tummy Tub time went fine. If she was cranky or tired ... not so much. See Happy Lei below.
 

In retrospect, I may have been a overly critical of the Tummy Tub in my initial review. This time around, Leighton found it rather enjoyable, for the most part. Plus, it's cute, conscientiously produced and a few readers commented that they love Tummy Tub. If the tub had a more practical stand, I would be inclined to try that too.

I think whether the Tummy Tub works for any family depends on both the parents and the child. As Janis remarked to me, "it boils down to what your priority is ... easy bathing experience for mom or dad or comfort for baby."  For me, it's both, and baby's comfort comes first. However, If baby isn't comfortable it may not work out.

Leighton and I may shelve the Tummy Tub, but I will definitely pull it out for another adventure if and when baby number two comes along.

This product review conforms to the Fuss Formula. 

WIN AN ORIGINAL TUMMY TUB

1. Leave a comment to this post telling us your favorite or least favorite thing about bath time.

2.  Comments close on 1/20 at 5PM CDT.

3. Your official comment posted during the specified time frame counts as an entry.

4. Your comment posted to the Facebook announcement of this giveaway will count as an entry too.

5. One comment will be selected as the winner.

6. Comments will each be assigned a number and winners will be chosen randomly using Random.org.

7. The winner will be announced on January 21, 2010.

8. The prize is one original Tummy Tub as pictured above. ($43 value)

GOOD LUCK!

Shut the Front Door

So here we are in the predictably unpleasant space where we didn't realize how unsanitary our adjectives were until we vowed to clean up our conversational english. Um ... yeah. We curse a lot.

I was giving Leighton a bath today - splashing about with a pink rubber ducky. Duck. Duck. Duck. Duck. Finally, I said This is a duck. Can you say duck? And she did! DUH-CKAH. Nofa King way I thought to myself.

SIDEBAR: The Nofa King (as in Nofa King chance in hell I would Facebook friend my ex) is the evil step-brother of the Sofa King (as in Sofa King drunk and Sofa King hungover).

The days of thinking that we can get away with using language inappropriate for a toddler are O-V-E-R. I guess that means I can't rock her to sleep while watching Entourage anymore either. Mommy. What's a douche bag? Nope. Not pretty.

Dear readers (assuming you all enjoy using the old mother-effer as much as me and anyone interviewed by James Lipton), how did you handle the transition from ice road trucker to responsible parent? I'm having trouble.

I'm never going to say shut the front door or cheese and crackers. I would start to hate myself rather quickly. But, I would like to find a reasonable way to avoid a kindergarten parent/teacher conference where it's explained to me that Leighton called Sadie a mother-fucker and we aren't invited back.

I realize that filling the adjective gap with foul language is just plain lazy and that far more descriptive words lead to more accurate expression. Moreover, we want our daughter to have an expansive vocabulary and swearing isn't going to help. Kids mimic their parents good or bad. I need to systematically eradicate the naughty words from the Freeman household and it's going to take some thoughtful effort.

While the plan is to use real words to calmly describe most situations, we still need a few replacements for those excited utterances that call for something more. I haven't come up with anything good and don't particularly care for what's out there. I will post a followup once I've settled on some favorites.

In the interim, I will rely on some old standbys; I have used shitake to replace one choice word and fuh(ck)-crying out loud can mask the f-bomb in a pinch. And maybe we'll inject some Orbitz-commercial speak to ease the transition from crass to class. It's relevant and silly. I mean what the french toast isn't funny about cootie queen and lint licker?

What expressions do you use in place of profanity in your kiddo-friendly household? Please post a comment and share your fuss with us!

What the Fuss? Feeding Frenzy Part II: Toddlerfeeding

As I mentioned yesterday, Lei's brush with disaster was the impetus for a post on all things fabulous for feeding. However, my list grew cumbersome rather quickly, so I separated my list of fantastically fussworthy feeding items out into breastfeeding and toddlerfeeding categories and numbered them to keep the confusion to a minimum.

In Feeding Frenzy Part I, I presented my list of amazing breastfeeding accoutrements. Today we're on to toddlerfeeding. Because this is Leighton's current stage, I am having a blast trying out lots of new products. Enjoy!

1) I make Leighton's food using the Beaba Babycook. I know what you're thinking ... What a pain in the ass! I'll stick with jars.I get that a lot. However, our pediatrician told us that she should eat as much table food as possible. So, my kid eats delicious dish made from scratch. Plus, I figure since Ryan cooks for us daily anyway, why should Lei eat bland, boiled meat in a jar?

The Beaba Babycook is a well-crafted appliance, spare in size, that steams and blends foods for your babe. With an all-in-one gadget like this, there's no need to make a huge mess. You can either make an event of making these meals, or toss in some of what you're having for a particular meal and freeze the rest for later. The Babycook makes it so simple, it's a meal time staple for me.

I cook for Leighton once a month and freeze the portions using item #2 below. Once frozen, I pop them into Ziploc freezer bags and we're good to go. Beef Stew and Cherub Chowder are just two hits found in #12 below. Lei likes food with hints of garlic, spices and onion and eats veggies most kids won't touch. Plus, her meals taste like real food (hmmm curious) and sometimes it's hard for me not to oversample her dish while I feed her. My mother-in-law bought the Babycook for us as a gift, which was a great savings for me because I was going to buy it anyway. It retails for $150.

2) Beaba Multiportion Food Storage Containers are perfect portion sizes. I have two, but in making a month of meals, I am going to pick up another. The retail for $20 and come in pink, orange and green. I got mine at Giggle.

3) Once Leighton's little fish teeth began peeking through her gums, we switched to Beaba silicone spoons. You can use these from the start, but I was so into the silver Tiffany spoon that my aunt gave as a shower gift that we used that and a healthy rotation of take and toss spoons until a few weeks ago. These Beaba spoons ($20 for a pack of four) are colorful implements that can really shovel it in. The handle is big enough for grown ups to get a good grip and they look so cool that I had to add them to the list.

4) We eat out quite a bit, granted we do it before six o'clock, and Phil and Ted's Me too portable highchair goes with us every time.  It has clamps that screw screw onto almost any table. Lei feels like a big shot in this chair because it allows her to be right where the action is at a conversational height. Plus, her legs dangle, which keeps her from pulling her new favorite stunt - trying to stand in the high chair. At $60, the price is a little steep, but again, we eat out often and for us, this chair is the difference between wolfing down dinner and lingering a bit after a fine meal. Last time we accidentally left it at home, we turned the car around and went back to get it.

5) Top 100 Baby Purees will get you from the very first, single food purees all the way to trickier dishes. If you are going to make your own baby food, this book is a must. $16 at Giggle.

6) I never to forget to bring my Zoli On-The-Go snack dispenser. I have forgotten to bring bottle, but whatever. The segments screw together and the top can hold formula or cereal. This colorful little item is practical and at $15, completely worth it. Incidentally, this is one of the Fussworthy items you can win this week! Enter to win.

7) Leighton has the coolest highchair - lucky little ducklet. Her Svan Highchair (tray cover and cushion too) look tremendous in our house. Our house isn't big enough to camoflauge a multi-colored, plastic masterpiece of a high chair, so wood was the way to go for us. The Svan is Scandinavian-designed, finely crafted and adjusts from six months through the teenage years which helped justify the expense. The chair and tray cover is $260 and the cushion is $40. Both were gifts from my mother-in-law but I was intent on buying them anyway once we graduated from the bebePod. Love the Svan!

8) My Udaipur Burp & Bib set has not yet arrived, but I can't wait. It's too cool and Indian fabrics are so hot right now. We don't really need burp cloths per se any more, but I'm sure I will find plenty of uses for them. In preparing this post, I saw that there is a matching crib set. I'm so glad I didn't see that before I placed my last order or I wouldn't have been able to help myself and we DO NOT need anymore bedding right now. Pick up this set of two burp cloths and matching bib for $39.

9) Leighton hates, HATES, wearing a bib, but we try. The Bumkins SuperBib is a wonderful compromise for us. The fabric is waterproof, it covers her, has a pocket and the best part is that I can wash it in the sink and hang it on the cabinet knob to dry. At $8 each, we rotate two and love them.

10) My mom has the cute pink Bumbo at her house. I opted for the bebPOD Plus (plus because it comes with a tray and a toy) - mostly because the red, shiny, molded, foam seat struck my fancy. And, after a little while, Lei could pull the tray, clearly an afterthought for the Bumbo people,right off with less than herculean strength. These seats only last for a few months and so it's a nice-to-have, for sure at $60. But, Lei was able to sit and participate in lots of activites she otherwise wouldn't have with out the bebePod.

11) Elegant Baby Bowl and Spoon set is fun and functional and comes in both pink and blue. The suction works and so it was an easy addition to the list - a fussworthy find for $15. One warning - the animal on the end of the spoon may be distracting because it's so darn cute.

12) Cooking for Baby has fancy meals for baby. My First Beef Stew is Lei's absolute favorite! This book makes it so easy to cook amazing fare for your teeny ones. This Lisa Barnes cookbook can be found with two different covers. Pick it up at Amazon or WIlliams Sonoma (green cover) for $20.

13) Take and Toss Straw Sippers made this list because we HATE sippy cups. Leighton thinks they're dumb and, frankly, I agree. If Europeans go right from bottle to cup, we can too. Lei prefers to ease the transition with a straw, and I'm fine with that. Cheapy Cheap at $3.49 for a four-pack.

14) The best part of the Combi Ergo Spoon and Fork Set is that baby can grab it, but I really picked it because we eat out a lot (did I mention that already?)and the set comes with a plastic case to protect from germs. Totally worth it for $6 at Giggle. This is the other Fussworthy item you can win this week! Enter to win.

This was fun! We welcome any comments you have good or bad about any of the products featured here. Feel free to mention any that we may have overlooked too! You never know what will turn up as the next Fussworthy giveaway.

This product review conforms to the Fuss Formula.

As you may have gathered, a number of my items can be found at Giggle. It's my favorite baby store and I registered there when I was pregnant. I love it so much I contacted them to be an affiliate advertiser. In the interest of full disclosure, The Daily Fuss does receive a small percentage of purchases made at Giggle when clicking through from our Giggle banner. Your support is certainly appreciated. Happy shopping!

What the Fuss? Feeding Frenzy Part I: Breastfeeding

As I mentioned here, Lei's brush with disaster was the impetus for this post on all things fabulous for feeding. I have compiled a list of extraordinary items for you and per the Fuss Formula my reasons for including each in this feeding frenzy of must-haves for nourishing your wee ones.

Once I got rolling, I realized that there are quite a few fussworthy finds, so I separated them out into breastfeeding and toddlerfeeding categories and numbered them to keep the confusion to a minimum. I'll tackle breastfeeding goodies today and toddlerfeeding in tomorrow's post. Enjoy!

 
  
I breastfed Leighton for nearly nine months. At that point, she had long since lost interest in the boobies except to smack them and laugh at me and I could no longer muster the will to pump in the face of such naughtiness on the part of my sassy daughter. I'm still a little sad about it, especially after reminiscing about all of the sweet gear that comes with breastfeeding, so I'm glad you're along for this trip down a most recent memory lane. Here we go ... The Daily Fuss's can't-breastfeed-without-'em items.

1) The Medela Freestyle breast pump is easily the best pump in town. As I discuss here in enthusiastic detail, it has expressive power, battery life, can pump both sides at once, is hands-free and clips to your waistband so you can walk around whilst you pump. This amazing little friend is worth every last penny. It retails for $379 (catch your breath) but I got mine brand new and sealed on eBay for $245. I would pay full price for it if I had to buy it again. Don't tether yourself to a pump pack the size of a boom box, get the Freestyle. You'll be glad you did.

2) Wee Go glass bottles are super duper cute and have a nice, safe, colorful, grippy cover. However, they are $18 each. I picked mine up at Babygap.com and unfortunately, I can't drum up a justification to overcome the excessive price tag. So, I'm sticking with my $2.50 Evenflo Classic Glass bottles. I actually used a box of each the 4oz and 8oz bottles for Jelly Belly filled shower decorations and ended up loving them. Here, I professed my love for the Adiri Natural Nursers, but once Leighton reached five months, she lost interest in them and I found the Evenflo Classic Glass easier to use - you can run them under hot water to heat them up quickly.  We also enjoy the Avent Natural Feeding bottles now that Lei sucks down a huge baba before bed. They are made in England, have the wide mouth and are easy to hold. You can pick them up for roughly $10 apiece.

3) We rarely use our Boppy now, but it was in high demand up until three weeks ago - I couldn't live without it. Now, we use it as a fancy TV pillow. I received the Boppy Barenaked pillow ($30) and organic cotton Boppy cover ($25) as shower gifts from my Giggle registry. There is no way you will get that load of wash done in the three hours you have between feedings. So do yourself a favor and register for two.

4) I was freshly sprogged up and searching online for a legitimate way to escape stretch marks when I stumbled upon Tummy Honey Butter. I used two jars through my entire pregnancy and I DON'T HAVE ANY STRETCH MARKS. Friends who have used it don't either. I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin'. You should get it. And, remember to rub it on your BOOBS! I pay $20 a jar at early-pregnancy-tests.com. They sell pregnancy and ovulation tests super cheap too - not to mention a thousand other things. Love that site!

5) Lily Padz are an amazing replacement for those cotton breast pads that get all wet and harbor ferocious bacteria leading to mastitis. At least ... that's what happened to me. I had successfully used Lily Padz for weeks and then I got nervous thinking that sticking silicone pasties on myself could be unhealthy and clog a duct. So I bought organic cotton pads and within a week had an infection fever, clogged ducts, pain the whole nine yards. I researched Lily Padz and found that hospital studies have proven them to be more clean and effective at stopping leaks than their cotton counterparts. I bought my Lily Padz at the fancy pharmacy by my house and paid $24.95 each for two pair. They lose their stick after a while but still work, so I had an everyday pair and another for special occasions like work meetings and weddings.

6) The Baby Bond Nursing Wrap is a soft, twisty piece of cotton knit fabric that basically turns any shirt into a nursing top so you can see your baby without putting your bare skin out there for the world to see. It's a keen invention and the product tagline is ever so clever - For Nursing and Conversing. Feed Your Baby. Nourish Your Relationship. Accompanying this brilliant design is a quality burp cloth that can hang from the wrap, as well as a handy little bag for storage. It looks great, rolls up quite small and goes right in the wash. I did not pay the $35 retail price as the wrap was sent to me courtesy of Baby Bond, but I absolutely would. In fact, the Baby Bond Nursing Wrap is the newest addition to my new mom gift bag.

7) If you are even thinking about breastfeeding you need The Ultimate Breastfeeding Book of Answers. I've read every chapter and found it to be the most useful and reliable book I have aside from What to Expect - both of which were shower gifts. It retails for $20 but you can get it for half that price on Amazon.

8) We cloth diapered Leighton and Caroline (love her) at Giggle talked me into trying Bambino Mio. We ditched them quite quickly (they leak) for Fuzzi Bunz (best pocket diapers EVER) which left us with sixteen Bambino Mio Nappies or prefold cloth inserts. So, we used them as burp cloths. I like them better than any other burp cloth we tried. Swaddle Designs burpies were an easy favorite, but they are pricey and I only like the one with the flannel strip, not the ribbon, yet you are forced to buy one of each in a two pack. Boo. Plus, they fade in the wash. Double boo. The cheapy cloth diapers from Babies R Us basically turn to cardboard over time. So, lucky me, stuck with high-quality, super-soft, multi-purpose nappies. At $35 for eight, I would buy them all over again - just skip the covers.

9) It may seem that including the Bebe Au Lait Hooter Hider AND the Baby Bond Nursing wrap is redundant or conflicting. However, if you are serious about breastfeeding get both. The Hooter Hider is an apron-like cover that allows you to see what you're doing underneath. The bonus of the Hooter Hider is that it shields baby from the distractions of the world whenever necessary. I received two as gifts and have spent the $32 to give them as gifts, as well. I praise the Hooter Hider in greater detail here and continue to give it two boobs up. Although, I will note that new moms may have an easier time with Baby Bond as it is less cumbersome.

We welcome any comments you have good or bad about any of the products featured here. Feel free to mention any that we may have overlooked too! You never know what will turn up as the next Fussworthy giveaway. And remember to check back tomorrow for fabulous toddlerfeeding gadgets, utensils, feeding seating and more.

This product review conforms to the Fuss Formula.

As you may have gathered, a number of my items can be found at Giggle. It's my favorite baby store and I registered there when I was pregnant. I love it so much I contacted them to be an affiliate advertiser. In the interest of full disclosure, The Daily Fuss does receive a small percentage of purchases made at Giggle when clicking through from our Giggle banner. Your support is certainly appreciated. Happy shopping!

Pears and Glass

I took prenatal vitamins and ate healthy food while pregnant with Leighton. I breast fed her for eight months, made my own baby food and continue to make her meals from scratch. And oh yeah ... I fed her glass the other day.

You heard me. FED HER GLASS. I am not proud of this mishap, but as cautionary tales go, this one turns out just fine.

The cliffs notes version of the terrifically harrowing saga goes something like this: We were driving back from St. Louis for Christmas Eve in Milwaukee. Lei, Lue and I were camped out in the back seat, having a wonderful time. After the seventh round of "point to Mommy's nose" Leighton got hungry. I reached for some Gerber pears because I figured they were pureed to a velvety consistency and Lei would be able to eat them in a moving vehicle without choking.

Yes. I realize that at the outset of this post, I congratulated myself for my Martha Stewart-like dedication to handcrafted baby food. However, I make it in large batches and freeze it, so it wouldn't have traveled without spoiling. I figured a few rule-breaking jars of America's favorite pears wouldn't be a dangerous deviation from our norm.

I was wrong. On the fourth bite, Lei started gagging and gasping. I could see that she was able to breathe, so I figured we had a "wrong pipe" situation. However, it lasted for sooo long that I had Ryan pull over. I quickly snapped her out of her seat, and after a few pats on the back, she was okay. By okay I mean wailing, bright red, and super duper pissed - like the time she rolled off the couch and fully blamed me for it.

I couldn't figure out what went so incredibly wrong for her, so I inspected the pears. They appeared fine, but when I stuck my finger inside the jar and felt under the label/sticker, I felt pieces of broken glass. BROKEN GLASS! WTF?

You couldn't even see the damage from the outside because the label covered up the crumbly glass and held it all together. Two jars must have banged into each other and this one got smacked just right. Gerber will be getting a letter from me. How unfortunate for them to injure the child of a woman with an audience. BUMMER FOR GERBER.

I didn't see any blood in Lei's mouth or throat and we managed to calm her down. Once I realized that she was out of immediate danger, I sat back and thought about the fact that I had, perhaps, just scooped a tiny shard of glass onto a spoon and fed it to the most precious little creature on my planet. The thought of it was so utterly ridiculous to me - like putting Tobasco on her eggs or letting her loose on a can of mixed nuts or letting her play on a window ledge or Munchausen syndrome or something equally odd. I couldn't comprehend it. And, if anything seriously traumatic would have happened, I'm not sure what I would be writing to you at this very moment. Shudder.

I dismissed the horrific thoughts and proceeded to load Lei up with roughly 12 ounces of formula. I proceeded to check her respirations and heart rate every five seconds for the rest of the ride home. I couldn't completely calm down. It sucked.

The long short is that Dr. Weissbluth's office told us to make our way home and check in with the ER Attending at Children's, which is less than two blocks from our house. We bundled up and walked there in the snow like we were headed to Argo for a holiday tea break.

There was no wait in the emergency room (it was pleasantly eerie) and Lei had a great time rifling through tongue depressors and making eyes at the nurses. She didn't even need an Xray and she pooped three times since, so we are out of the woods with regard to crapping shards of Gerber safety glass. WHEW!

Anyway, the point of this - other than the fact that I will never feed my child Gerber food again - is that I will never feed my child Gerber food again. Oh wait. I said that already. If you are wondering why I don't just buy the plastic tubs of food instead, the answer is that I think contents smell and taste like plastic. Who knows how long that boiled food sits in there before your kid eats it? And, if I feed Lei commercially prepared baby food, I use Earth's Best because it looks, smells and tastes much better. The grocery store just happened to be out of pears the day we packed for our trip.

Bottom line: Nothing beats mama's (or daddy's) cooking - just ask Leighton.

So, I got to thinking about all of the cool gear we've used to feed Leighton since birth, and tomorrow's post is a ginormous What the Fuss? on all things feeding. Like anything you do in the kitchen, you simply must have good equipment, and I am more than happy to share my fuss with you.

Get Cozy

Some kids can sleep on any surface. Unfortunately, Leighton is not one of those kids. She's decidedly a kid who's sleep would be disrupted by a teeny pea seated beneath twenty mattresses and twenty eider-down beds.

Nearly four months ago, I wrote about the "special" way I would put Leighton to bed and how I was impressed and a little bit sad that someone else had mastered the "special" way too. Read Sleepy Sweet Relief. I've also recently discussed the fact that Leighton is not the most consistent sleeper. Read Cry It Out.

The only predictable part of our special sleepy time routine includes her clutching her lovie while I tell her to "get cozy". At some point, after I've run through the list of all things cozy, she will roll over on her side and go to sleep. Or try to sleep anyway.

However, as Leighton has recently explained to me, it is far easier to get cozy when ensconced in maximum comfort. When she was rather fresh from the oven and didn't move much during the night, she slept piled upon several layers of fleece blankets, topped with an Aden and Anais blanket as a gauzy sweat barrier. We joked that Leighton liked her bed to feel heavenly. And so it was.

Since the enormous pile of blankets is more hazardous than comforting to an almost eight month-old who likes to flip around in her sleep, we've removed the Princess and the Pea style super mattress situation from her crib. The new and now unimproved sleep surface is less than ideal for my little princess. COZY IS DEAD is the impression I get from Leighton's revamped sleepy time routine, which brilliantly includes tossing, turning, crying and squawking.

Lei's been sick; She's basically had a cold since starting Kids' Work. And, because a stuffy nose accompanies each bout of the plague without exception, sleep has become a state in which she drifts in and out between nose blows. So, I figure that her bedtime battles have at least something to do with the feeling that her sinuses are caught in a vice. I get sick every time she does and that's how my sinuses feel, so I project, empathize and rationalize.

Cozy has taken on a new meaning of late. Last night, Lei and I camped on the floor in her room atop a doubled-up down comforter with down pillows beneath my head and her entire body. Lei covered up with her magenta Little Giraffe blanket, lovie in hand, and I snuggled up in quilts my mom had made. At one point, we moved the arrangement to bed with daddy and Lue. Between the fluffy linens and Tylenol, we slept like champs all night long.

If Leighton is lying next to me on a pillow, she closes her eyes and drifts off within minutes. I don't even need to sing her to sleep or wait for her to fart around in her crib for an hour before tiring enough to be rocked to sleep. GENIUS. Plus, once she's asleep, I can take her to her own bed. Which still allows for mommy and daddy time. A small price to pay in my humble opinion for a sleeping beeb.

It's a hard habit to break. And truthfully, I don't know that I really want to.

I'm sure someone out there has a comment for me on the family bed sleeping arrangement or on how irresponsible I am to let Lei sleep with the down of ten thousand geese. Let 'er rip and share your fuss with us!

What the Fuss? Boogie Buster

Leighton is currently experiencing her second cold, which means that her nose has been runny for five of the last six weeks. It is oh-so-very annoying.

I stuck that saline spray thingy in Lei's nose once and pulled the trigger - NO GOOD! I'm surprised we're still on speaking terms. Her eyes got wide as saucers and she started screaming, gagging and choking. That was a ridiculous exercise - tantamount to baby waterboarding. If the CIA is banned in engaging from the activity, you probably shouldn't try it on your kid.

After three weeks of constant nose wiping, restless sleep and chasing my little girl around with a blue boogie sucking bulb that didn't actually relieve her of the aforementioned inconveniences, Ryan found the Graco Nasal Clear Nasal Aspirator at Walgreens. THIS THING IS AWESOME!

When I say thing I am referring to a battery-powered snot-sucker. It's gentle, has two different-sized tips to ensure a good seal, plays music and is quite easy to clean. Plus, Leighton really doesn't mind at all - probably because it's kind of silly and she knows it makes her feel better.

I believe Ryan paid  $27 for this fabulous little gadget at Walgreens in Lincoln Park, but I saw it on Diapers.com for $19.99, and they offer free shipping and coupons for nearly every shopping experience. Plus, they ship fast and returns are free.

No matter how you slice it, I would pay $50 to replace my Graco Boogie Buster if I had to. I would pay far more if there was only one left on the planet and mine was lost or broken. I just can't bear to live without it anymore. MOMS TO BE: Don't forget to add this handy item to your registries!

This product review conforms to the Fuss Formula.

Is anyone else smitten with this boogie buster? Please share your fuss with us!

Cry It Out

So, I finally got some sleep.

I'm sitting at Boston Logan, enjoying a beer and internet access, missing my family and ... I am not sleep deprived. It's strange. No Leighton. No 3 AM feeding. Yes. Still. At 6 and a half months. I miss home terribly, but I had a great time in bean town. I worked. I toured. I slept! I barely even remember getting up once to pump.

Prior to my Boston trip, we attended a wedding and my fifteen year, high-school reunion.  I must have told everyone I met that I was exhausted, because somehow, the conversation always turned to my sleep deprivation and the fact that Leighton is not yet sleeping through the night.

On the subject of baby sleeping habits I discovered that there were two distinct factions of parents. One group owned the oh-so-annoying story of "she's been sleeping through the night since eight weeks."  The other group was the "cry it out" contingent.

If I had a nickel for every person who told me to gear up for two nights of hysteria followed by blissful slumber, I'd have at least five bucks. Still, I can't imagine that Dr. Ferber thinks that leaving a child in her crib to sob until vomiting is a great idea.

On my business trip, a colleague and mother told me to apply the Ferber method gently and gradually. This seems like a far more time-consuming but equally more pleasant option.

I know I'm being played like a fiddle when I trot into Leighton's room at 2 AM to replace the nukka that's fallen out of her sweet little mouth. But, I choose to believe that she enjoys the pleasure of my company; Her manipulative intentions are more good than evil. If she realized that in the course of an evening I am jerked awake by her cries more often than I would be if riding the Eurail through the Pyrenees, through the night, unable to recline, in a smoking car, with the lights on, she would certainly stop. Right?

So, I'm interested. How many of you out there just let 'em cry it out? And, how much torture did you withstand before you began to crumble? Please post to comments and share your fuss with us!

Weanie

I know that breast feeding isn't easy for everyone. Many women struggle. But, I didn't. Leighton is a great little eater and has been from the start. Around five and a half months, we introduced some solid foods - avocado, sweet potato, rice cereal ...  I was still mostly feeding her myself, but the solids were adding an air of excitement to the repertoire.

We started at Kids' Work two weeks ago - Leighton attends every tuesday and has a nanny and grandma to care for her the rest of the week. We thought Kids' Work would be a good place for Leighton to hone her mini social skills and learn about what the other kiddles are up to.

I guess it works the same way for parents. I walked in and saw three other little Lei-sized peanuts, sitting in high chairs, munching on puffs. "You know ... puffs."

No. I didn't know about puffs. As it turns out, I didn't know about many things made by Gerber, and I don't much care to ... except for the puffs. Those little things are attractive. They come in flavors like cherry and sweet potato and dissolve in your babe's mouth. Brilliant.

I decided to procure some puffs. I picked Lei up from her first daycare experience and we went to Target. Opposite the wall of Gerber products are the sippy cups. As I stared at this fantastic wall of plastic, it occurred to me that my kid is growing ... fast ... and will continue to require different kinds of foods and beverages. Once the "puffs" excitement wore off, I got a little sad. Then I vowed to find non-plastic sippy cups. 

It got worse. Over the past few weeks, Leighton has reserved her breast feeding for evenings only and even that is dwindling. I feel guilty, and I know I shouldn't. I want my body back, but the weaning thing is just so sad. What if I only have one child and this is it?

As I write this, I'm quite sure my days are numbered. I just had the flu and couldn't even get up to pump the other night. Let's just say my shirts are a bit larger in the bust at the moment.

We Go Booms

I glanced away for a second and she rolled off the little couch in her room. I still cannot believe it. I propped her up on her little slip-covered, love seat sleeper  - butt in the corner - as I folded laundry a few feet away. Anneke knocked on the door and I turned my head to tell Lue to hush and I heard a "bink" and a  "WHAAAAA!".

I felt so horrible. Lei lolled off the couch and fell approximately 1.5 feet. Luckily, the Boppy papasan seat broke her fall. In the blink of an eye, the child I spent 10 months hatching and 6 months preserving in an untainted state, went from happily sitting on the couch to laying on the floor, teeny arm pinned beneath her, screaming.

Lei leered at me through tear-brimmed eyes with incredible fear-turned-utter-betrayal. Her temp shot up at least 3 degrees. She was so pissed at me. It took two solid minutes to calm her down to the point I could inspect her precious little parts. All the while I felt like Anneke should call DCFS to report my carelessness.

Once Leighton's demeanor fell to the level of manageable, I checked every millimeter of her perfect trunk, back, limbs and head. The only damage appeared minor - a quickly appearing bruise on her cheek and a small bump on her head - from the life-saving Boppy seat.

I offered a boobie and she took it. The whole ordeal was quickly forgotten. Whew.

This happened two weeks ago and I still feel bad about it. I felt so bad for nearly two weeks that I stopped posting for a spell because I figured that if I have time to write about my kid, I should certainly have enough time to keep her from severely injuring herself.

I know. I have ceased the self-deprecating thrashing. But, I have learned. A naked clown (clowns freak me out so I chose to use one as an extreme and absurd example) could run through my house and I wouldn't take my eyes off of my couch-seated babe.

She's not going to tumble again. Not on my watch.

What the Fuss? Moby Wrap

It looked cozy and comfortable. So, I bought one. Actually, I bought two. Yep. That's my buying criteria - It looked cool and could make life that much more pleasant. I wasn't wrong. In fact, I was spot on in the case of the Moby Wrap baby carrier. I love the Moby, and have introduced many others to it.  So far, no one is disappointed. Including Leighton who is passed out in the accompanying picture.

The Moby Wrap is basically one large swath of 100% stretchy, cotton knit - like soft and sturdy tee shirt material. You fold it in half the long way, criss cross it over your shoulders and secure it around your waist. Then, you peel a layer open and tuck your peanut inside. I saw someone on the street with one and I sought it out online.

There are a multitude of ways to carry your wee one in the Moby Wrap - from preemie to thirty-five pounder. Each Moby Wrap thankfully comes with a color photo instruction booklet to illustrate the various holds. And, at $44.95, it's a bargain compared with the other types of carries that can cost upwards of $100. Admittedly, my next purchase was going to be the Lillebaby Everywhere Carrier if the Moby didn't work. And Moby is much kinder to your back muscles.

I am enamored with my Moby. When Leighton was fresh from the oven, snugging her into the Moby was a sure fire way to calm her down if she started crying. I could breastfeed her in it without disturbing her.  And, I could do other things while holding her if needed. What? No way!

I will admit that wrapping myself in what appeared to be a small hammock was intimidating at first. In fact, I felt that way about a number of my baby accoutrements. It's one thing to register for sweet baby gear and quite another to identify the moment in time each becomes potentially useful. Eventually, you must decide whether you're ready to use a particular piece of your sweet baby gear beyond the walls of your home so as to publicly declare its utility.

I overcame my fear in the midst of Leighton's very first meltdown two days after coming home from the hospital. I pulled out my freshly laundered, kakhi-colored Moby, followed the instructions, and slipped Lei between the fabric folds. Voila! It felt like a giant ACE bandage held my baby close to my body in a most comforting way. She was safe and secure higher up on my chest and her weight was distributed across my entire back. She was quiet and instantly asleep, I was comfortable and ... my hands were free! Damn. It was magical. I kept a nukka in one of the other fabric fold for easy access if she started fussing again.

We used the Moby to take Leighton to restaurants. Okay. Some were technically bars, but they serve great food, we sat out on the patio and we never stayed past sundown with Lei. It folds up flat so it's easy to toss in the bottom of the stroller. It's perfect for air travel too. It won't set off a metal detector and you can skip the car seat with a teeny weeny baby because they're attached to you.

After a few days I had the wrapping routine down to under a minute. I mastered the cradle hold and eventually a few of the others. I highly recommend the moby and it gets more fun as your baby grows. We're going to try the Lotus hold today.

This product review conforms to the Fuss Formula.

We love to hear about your experiences - good or bad. Please post a comment and share your fuss with us!

The Darker Side of Love

My imagination can get the best of me. And it does. At night, after I've fed Leighton (for the third time that evening) I think. What if we find out something is wrong with her? What if she dives head first into the shallow end when she's six? What if someone kidnaps her? What if she drinks and drives? What if ... ?

So morbid. So awful. I know. But, it crosses my mind. I am a mother. I cannot help myself. How do I find peace?

I let go. One tiny piece at a time, I accept that which I cannot control.

I suppose you're wondering why I'm compelled to dwell on the heavier side of parenthood. It's a confluence of things. A friend's four year-old neice was diagnosed with a fatal and horrible disease. Another close friend faces uncertainty with her son's social and emotional future. My gorgeous and brilliant cousin died of cancer at fifteen after an eleven month battle.

Fuuuuck. It's too much. And, when I think about Leighton in the context of the foregoing, I can hardly breathe.

When I reach the "can hardly breathe" space, I have two choices. I can continue to obsess over the worst possible scenario and never let any of us leave the house or I can just let go.

Let go? It sounds so simple.

It isn't. And, it is.

I accept the death of all that I love, all that I live for, and I rest. It's a perpetual exercise of letting go, but it works. If I spend my time attempting to prevent kidnap and cancer (in the abstract, of course) and fretting over Lei getting her license fifteen years from now, I will certainly dilute the richness of her experience as my daughter and the corresponding joy I am sure to experience with her.

It blows my mind how tightly love and loss, and pain and learning go together so suspiciously, unexpectedly and perfectly. That's the rub of parenting - you love this little person so much it breaks your heart when they cry, or call you mama, or cut a tooth or fall down or ... worse. Or, you burst into tears just watching them sleep.

We are responsible for our children and control their fate to some degree. We take the calculated daily risks (getting in the car, for example) and wait until the wee hours for panic to swell. But when the sun rises and we see the smiling faces, we put our fears aside and embrace the bravery, confidence and silliness our kids have come to expect from us.

If and when our little clan is forced to face the unexpected turns of fate, we will rise to the occasion and dedicate every breath we have to getting through it and making it work for us. This bond of love, strength and confidence is what gets me through the night.

Time for bed ...

What the Fuss? Baby Bottles

Leighton gets boobie juice exclusively, but we have no problem delivering it to her in a bottle. I work and can't always be right there for her at feeding time.

I wanted safe bottles and originally bought Evenflo Classic glass. However, they were so non boob-like that we never used them to feed her. I do use them constantly to refrigerate milk after I pump - milk reheats easily in glass just by running the bottle under hot water.

We registered at Giggle and they carry Adiri Natural Nursers. At $25 for two, I doubted that anyone would buy them for me. I was right. Never deterred by a price tag, I splurged and bought all three stages.

The Adiri bottles are a bit different. You unscrew the vented cap at the bottom of the bottle and turn it upside down to fill it. The top part with the nipple is smooth, soft silicone that mimics a breast. Babies can even push their little face into it. Fascinating!

We let Leighton have a shot at the stage 1 bottle after three days on the planet. She busied herself with it, smacking away until it was empty. Success! We've kept these gems in the rotation ever since and Leighton has never been confused or preferred the bottle to me.

We switched to the stage 2 (blue) bottle after five weeks because Lei likes to slam her food. We experimented briefly with the stage 3 (yellow) bottle last week during a bout of cluster feeding, but milk shot out of the corners of her mouth. So, at four months, we are sticking with stage 2.

These bottles rule because they: 1) weigh very little and Leighton can hold them and feed herself; 2) are easy to clean (I put them in the dishwasher daily) and 3) have so few parts (cover, bottle and vent) that nothing gets lost or falls through the holes in the dishwasher rack.

We love these bottles. Two boobs up!

This product review conforms to the Fuss Formula. 

Tip: The only perceptible difference between the three stages is the number of holes in the nipple. To save money, you could just buy two bottles and poke more holes as your baby grows. You can always buy two more if you have another baby.

Making Weight

Leighton is fed breast milk exclusively.  Well, exclusively if I choose to discount day four of her life, when the pediatrician frightened me into believing that my baby could be starving.

 

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before …

Leighton was born late on a Sunday evening weighing eight pounds four ounces and measuring twenty and a half inches long.  I never questioned whether I would breast feed her and, as I had hoped, Lei latched on like a little champ five minutes post-delivery. I had prepared for this moment for several months and was confident that bearing the sole responsibility of providing nourishment for my child would be a piece of cake.

 

The pediatrician stopped in to see us and asked that we make our first appointment for Thursday – which for all calendar-related purposes was day five. Because Leighton was born so late in the evening, I was tempted to make the appointment for Friday instead because I didn’t think she should get “credit” for the whole day Sunday and that would actually make Friday day four, in my opinion. I figured this one-day difference was crucial because my awesome breast feeding book warned me that babies don’t usually start gaining weight back until day five.

I threw caution to the wind and hauled my sore, puffy self to the pediatrician on Thursday. Ryan carried Leighton in her car seat and we stepped into the exam room.  The Dr. inspected my gorgeous girl, commenting on her perfect color, skin, strength, alertness and overall pleasant disposition.  Then she pulled out a calculator and after a quick calculation grew very serious. “I’d like to see you back tomorrow. Leighton has lost 14% of her body weight since birth and I’m concerned about a possible failure to thrive.” WTF?

Well. When you’re encapsulated in a free-feeding hydration chamber for ten months, you are bound to pop out as plump as can be. Eight pounds, four ounces is big by many standards. I understand that Pediatricians don’t want to see babies dip below ten percent of their birth weight, but surely nature will prevail and my baby will thrive. Right?  I knew before I’d left the house today that that this would be the doctor’s response because most of my friends were asked to follow up with their babies that had lost too much weight. I wasn’t going to let this bother me.

I had to ask, “Why wouldn’t she be losing some weight? My milk hasn’t even come in yet?” The Dr. ignored the direct question, reiterated her concern, ordered us to return the very next day for another weigh in and mentioned that I may want to give Leighton three ounces of formula every other feeding. What?!?!

Yup. I had to gear up to leave the house all over again, no matter that it took us three hours to get out the door for the first visit or that I could barely walk because I had given birth less than one hundred hours earlier. Moreover, it was suggested that I cave in on my plan to breast feed exclusively because somehow, my natural ability to feed my baby may be compromised.

I have never been one to fail a test and we sure as hell weren’t going to blow tomorrow’s weigh in. I offered Lei a boob every ninety minutes and pumped while she slept. I was so exhausted by cramming for this exam, that two hours before the appointment I vowed there would be no retake. I mixed up three ounces of Similac or Enfamil (that I had received free in the mail and kept just in case) and fed it to my baby.

I am happy to report that Leighton gained seven ounces overnight.  I felt guilty for feeding her the powdered milkshake, but was more relieved that I really didn’t need to give it to her in the first place.  I don’t think formula is bad. I choose to breast feed because: 1) I know it’s good for Leighton; 2) It’s free; 3) I enjoy the time I get to spend with Lei while I feed her; 4) The poopy cloth diapers aren’t so bad.

I'm never going to let a Dr. pressure me again when I know better about what to do for my baby. And, if I am blessed enough to have another baby, we're waiting until day five to make our first visit to the pediatrician.

Did anyone else have a similar experience? Did you intend to breast feed but then scrapped the plan because you thought you weren’t producing enough milk? Did your Dr. freak you out about your baby’s weight gain? Please share!