" It's difficult to make things easy and easy to make things difficult." Ryan loves to apply this little nugget to any number of situations. The thing is ... it works. It works so well, it's kind of annoying.
For example, it's a pain to clean up the kitchen and put the dishes away immediately after dinner. But, the longer you leave the ziti to cure in the Emile Henry baker, the more of a pain in the ass it will be to scrub it off. Deal with the difficult and make things easy by eliminating work for yourself.
Or, let's say you HATE heading to the gym. No wait ... you loathe the gym. No wait ... I loathe the gym. WHATEVER. No matter the level of detestation, my life is far less complicated with arms (not thighs) attached to my shoulders and a smaller butt. So, difficult gym now, easy peasy, meltdown-free zone when getting dressed to go out on Saturday night.
Ryan's wisdom can certainly be applied to matters of the financial persuasion. Saving cash sucks for most people - myself included. It takes planning, dedication and a certain amount of restraint. For me, it feels like an sadistic exercise in self-deprivation - empowerment and torture rolled into one effort. However, the future will be far easier with some cash in the bank. Duh. So simple, yet so tough to follow.
As difficult as it may be to make things easy, the reverse is true. It's easy to pick a fight and say something you'll regret. It's easy to grow complacent in a relationship, take your partner for granted ot blame them for making you absolutely nuts. And when you have kids, you have even less time for yourselves. It's no secret that relationships require cultivation and this fact is Ryan's number one reason for bandying about this favorite bit of daddy wisdom.
I'm exhausted with a splash of nostalgic today (Leighton turns one in a few weeks) and I leave tomorrow for a girls' weekend in Napa without Ryan or Leighton (or Lue for that matter). I miss my squad already and crave some purely relaxing one-on-one time with my wonderful husband - free from discussions of house hunting, grocery shopping, the effing gym class schedule, laundry or diapers. I wouldcharacterize this past year as chaotic joy. Now, we just need to do a little extra nurturing to make the coming year a little easier on us.
I'm feeling sort of exposed today and in the sharing mood. I'd love for you to share back. Please leave a comment and discuss your fuss with us.
Well said Katie! Thanks for the share. xo
Posted by: Jen Freeman | Thursday, March 04, 2010 at 05:33 AM
I really love this post. I used to think that "treating" myself by doing things that felt good in the moment (like not going to class in college, or buying something that I couldn't or shouldn't afford) would make me feel good. I would justify that I "work hard" and I deserve what ever this "treat" maybe. It basically has taken a metaphorical baseball bat to my head to realize that I actually feel GREAT when I do things that I am SUPPOSE to do, even though the very thought of doing them may make me nauseous. On the flip side, I feel ten times worse when I neglect to do something or indulge in my instant gratification side that seems to come so natural to me. Maybe postponing that gratification is the trick to actual peace and happiness. I don't know, but clearly I am feeling quite exposed this evening myself. Thank you for writing this;)
Posted by: Katie Borzych | Wednesday, March 03, 2010 at 11:08 PM
Well the silver lining is that it's relatable. :) Thanks so much for sharing Liz!
Posted by: Jen Freeman | Wednesday, March 03, 2010 at 02:41 PM
Wow!! This really hit home for me. Without airing all my dirty laundry ---- sorry to tell you, but it doesn't get any easier the older the kids get. In fact, it MAY seem to get more difficult to have the 'me' time or the alone time with the spouse. My dh and I have not had a good run of it lately. I have recently ---very recently --- gone back to the gym and like you........ loathe the gym, but just last night was telling dh that I need to do that for myself. It makes me feel better and that I'm doing something for myself (even though that's not what I would really LIKE to be doing). That went along with ---- "I'm done worrying about money and such because it doesn't do me any good to worry and lose sleep and be stressed out over it. However, when we CAN do something, we need to do it right away or asap to make things 'easier in the long run.' That said............ I definitely appreciate this post. Good luck and this too shall pass. :-)
Posted by: Elizabeth Snyder | Wednesday, March 03, 2010 at 02:16 PM